Meltdown

Last week I nearly had a meltdown and went against all the advice.  I almost threw in the towel and decided that my novel was never going to happen.  I was ready to commission it to the bottom draw and try something else.

I was actually too stressed to even open my scrivener project to see whether anything would come to me.  I didn’t touch it for 5 days.  Not that that hasn’t happened before, but this time I felt like I was never going to be able to go back to it.  I kept telling myself that I had more important things to do.

But all the advise kept running through my mind.  You will never finish a manuscript if you don’t keep writing.  To be a writer you have to write.

So on Saturday, I bit the bullet and opened my manuscript.  Maybe if I just had a look at it, with a few clear hours on my hands, I might get my nerve back.  I started to write but drew a blank very quickly.  Only 114 words.  I think the main problem was that I was feeling that it was all just a bunch of short stories and I had no idea how they would all come together and I still had no idea what the ending would be.

So I went back to the AWC Creative Writing Course notes and thought about my characters.  I really didn’t know any of them very well, except perhaps the main protagonist.  So I spent a couple of hours writing  profiles of all my characters and then spent a bit of time on a synopsis.

So bottom line is I have now added another 900 words to the actual story (and deleted a few) and have a slightly clearer idea of where the story is going.  Still no ending in sight……

10 Comments

  1. Well done on hanging in there! The whole process must be a frustrating one at times. I am in awe of your progress to date – to say nothing of your courage in writing a book!
    Remind yourself that it WILL happen, even if you need to go back, revise, reword, discard some bits and then change direction.
    I am absolutely positive it will be a great read when it is finished! I have good reason to say that, having read your Genealogy essays!

    Stay safe and well. (((Hugs))) from Anne

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    1. Hi Anne. It is wonderful to hear from you. And thanks for the kind words and encouragement. I am back on track again now… for the moment. Hope you and yours are staying safe and well too.

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      1. All well here thanks Pauline. Trying to achieve some tasks that have been hanging around for a while . . only trouble is, every time we get something done, another 3 appear in its place! 🙂

        Let us catch up in REAL LIFE once this is all over!

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  2. Hang in there Pauline. Some days are hard, especially at the moment. The thing with writing is that one day it seems like the well has permanently dried up, and the next, it’s overflowing. I don’t know where it comes from, but I know it comes. All the best with your novel. You’ll get there.

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  3. Hi Pauline
    I know what you mean! Writing is a gift and some days it is wrapped up in layers too hard to remove! Characters, scenes, plots and chapters are the wrappings for your story! Research, thinking, reading and sharing with a group are valuable strategies for revealing the writing! I find it useful to share in my blog as you do! Come on over to the Facebook group to share your progress with others.

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  4. Yes very well done. I have been listening to different ideas to get motivated and keep
    Writing and some of them have been very good. Certainly helping me to get fresh ideas and information to write about.

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