Last week I nearly had a meltdown and went against all the advice. I almost threw in the towel and decided that my novel was never going to happen. I was ready to commission it to the bottom draw and try something else.
I was actually too stressed to even open my scrivener project to see whether anything would come to me. I didn’t touch it for 5 days. Not that that hasn’t happened before, but this time I felt like I was never going to be able to go back to it. I kept telling myself that I had more important things to do.
But all the advise kept running through my mind. You will never finish a manuscript if you don’t keep writing. To be a writer you have to write.
So on Saturday, I bit the bullet and opened my manuscript. Maybe if I just had a look at it, with a few clear hours on my hands, I might get my nerve back. I started to write but drew a blank very quickly. Only 114 words. I think the main problem was that I was feeling that it was all just a bunch of short stories and I had no idea how they would all come together and I still had no idea what the ending would be.
So I went back to the AWC Creative Writing Course notes and thought about my characters. I really didn’t know any of them very well, except perhaps the main protagonist. So I spent a couple of hours writing profiles of all my characters and then spent a bit of time on a synopsis.
So bottom line is I have now added another 900 words to the actual story (and deleted a few) and have a slightly clearer idea of where the story is going. Still no ending in sight……